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Does it suck?

YES!!!! :(
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NO!!!! :)
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Total votes : 14

Incredigirl's art

Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Sun Apr 25, 2010 12:26 am

Did I put this in the right place :?: If not, sorry for making (another) illigetimate post.
So, in English class this week, we had a contest. We were to pick some article of clothing (or other personal item) and write a poem about it. I won the contest, and got a pretty sweet (but pink...ugh :cry: ) water bottle with an inside part you freeze. Any way, it's about my current "phase" (or stage of Asperger's caused obsession) of The Incredibles, and pertains to my prized sweatshirt. So far, "the phase" has lasted 5 yrs, but Iv'e only had the sweatshirt for 3 yrs. I used no thesaurus, I wrote this in 15 mins, and edited for 5 mins in the library, so forgive the suckishness.



The Phase

I have had it for three years
The thought of losing it brings me to tears
I fear that it may get too small
Or that I may grow too tall
I like to wear it every day
Even in the sun's hot rays
Its warmth brings me so much pleasure
Its worth I could never measure
It's soft and grey and oh so warm
I MUST have it in this storm!!!
I love it and it loves me
We go together quite perfectly
It has stitches of red and yellow
And depicts my favorite cartoon fellows
Their crest brightly embroidered in the middle
They stand, circling it, seeming startlingly little
Mostly I just love them, they look so cute!
Their smirks and stances look so astute
Their eyes, their faces, so brightly colored
If they were real I would likely smother
It seems obsessive, I know it's true
But I love them, I really do!
POW!! It would be so cool to watch them fight
Then at my house they could stay the night
I may grow out of The Phase, you never know
But until then, I'll wear my sweatshirt in the snow.


Posted: Sat May 01, 2010 1:42 pm
Edit/Delete this post
Reply with quote


Here's the removed one(sorry I made a bad, unneeded thread, mods )

PIXAR

Some people say my poems kill
But the People at Pixar posess real skill
Andrew Stanton: he's pretty cool
He made Wall*E's spaceship ands Nemo's school
Pete Docter: He's a beast
Monstropolis is awesome, and Paradise falls is a visual feast
Lee Unkrich: He's great
He helped with Sulley, and might direct Toy Story 8(just kidding)
Brad Bird: he's the man
Remy's La Ratatouille, and Elastigirl strapped to a work van
John Lasseter: he's the boss
Big Bug City, andy's room, and the apartment of Al, the hoss
People like my rhymes
Why? They take no time
Pixar is devoted
3-5 years is a lot of time for a film
I don't care if you hate them, your skills are worthless and slim
I love Pixar, their employees, and their flicks
You insult them just to get your kicks


Here's the edited, better, longer version:

PIXAR

Some people say my poems kill
But the People at Pixar possess real skill
Andrew Stanton: he's pretty cool
He made Wall*E's spaceship ands Nemo's school
Pete Docter: He's a beast
Paradise Falls is awesome, and Monstropolis is a visual feast
Lee Unkrich: He's great
He helped with Sulley, and I think he might be directing Toy Story 8
Brad Bird: he's the man
Remy's La Ratatouille, and Elastigirl strapped to a work van
John Lasseter: he's the boss
Bug City, andy's room, Radiator Springs, and the apartment of Al, the hoss
People like my rhymes
Why? They take no time
I love Pixar, their employees, and their flicks
Watching the movies gets me my kicks
Pixar is devoted
All their movies are loaded
With action and emotion
And exciting settings, like France and the ocean
My favorite film studio
As much fun as a rodeo
Twice as much work as directing a play
I want to work there some day
True, I do not possess the skill
But my life I hope to fulfill
Some people can say their kids have changed their lives
Some people are obsessed with knives
Well, movies have shaped my personality
Without Toy Story, I would be a spiritless body
The Incredibles has been my favorite movie for 5 years
My first viewing brought me to tears
I love Pixar’s movies, I think they’re great
I was obsessed long before I was 8
I’ll be 15 in June, 6 months older than Toy Story’s release
I’ll see Toy Story 3 on my birthday, and it will be a treat
That’s my Pixar poem; it’s really not that good
But I wrote my feelings like all good poets should



A Pixar fan poem by Virginia Hubbard
Last edited by IncredigirlVirginia on Thu Aug 12, 2010 12:06 am, edited 4 times in total.
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Postby The Star Swordsman » Sun Apr 25, 2010 2:00 am

Dude, that was pretty sweet, deep, and thoughtful! I can tell that this poem really came from the heart. It's really nicely and beautifully written. Very nice. I love it!
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Postby Konrad » Sun Apr 25, 2010 2:06 am

Oh, that's so cool IncredigirlVirginia! I love it!

Oh, and you'd better not grow out of the "phase!" :D
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Sun Apr 25, 2010 2:23 am

Aw, you guys are just too nice. It's really weird...for every word, one that rhymed just popped into my head. It wasn't hard, and I almost didn't feel like I did anything. I would love to post a photo of said sweatshirt, but alas, I have none on my mom's PC, and I can't find any online :(
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Postby Konrad » Sun Apr 25, 2010 2:49 am

That's the sign of a true poet when the words just pop out of your mind. ;)
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Postby Badger » Sun Apr 25, 2010 10:55 am

That's pretty cool - and what do you know, I have Aspergers too. :P

That's called a 'phase'? I never knew. Heh, I experience that as well for other stuff... :P
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Sun Apr 25, 2010 1:10 pm

Well, whatever you're obsessed with is called your "point of focus", but I call each of my obsession's "phases", because they last me several years. My first was Toy Story and Pooh Bear at the same time, and all of mine were either Disney or DisneyXPixar.
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Postby lizardgirl » Sun Apr 25, 2010 6:40 pm

Great poem, IncredigirlVirginia! This is something that I'm sure a lot of people on these boards have experienced at some point, and your poem describes these feelings really eloquently. I like the rhyming scheme as well, as it really helps push the rhythm of the poem along.
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Mon Apr 26, 2010 1:11 am

Aw, thanks, lizardgirl. :D
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Postby TAMATER » Mon Apr 26, 2010 11:55 pm

Really cool, IncredigirlVirginia! That is probably the best fan-written poem I've seen on the Pixar Planet Forums! Also, I like how you made every line rhyme with the next. Very little people can do that! :)
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Tue Apr 27, 2010 12:38 am

Thanks, TAMATER! It's called couplets when every 2 lines match. :D
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Sat May 01, 2010 1:42 pm

Here's the removed one(sorry I made a bad, unneeded thread, mods )



PIXAR

Some people say my poems kill
But the People at Pixar posess real skill
Andrew Stanton: he's pretty cool
He made Wall*E's spaceship ands Nemo's school
Pete Docter: He's a beast
Monstropolis is awesome, and Paradise falls is a visual feast
Lee Unkrich: He's great
He helped with Sulley, and might direct Toy Story 8(just kidding)
Brad Bird: he's the man
Remy's La Ratatouille, and Elastigirl strapped to a work van
John Lasseter: he's the boss
Big Bug City, andy's room, and the apartment of Al, the hoss
People like my rhymes
Why? They take no time
Pixar is devoted
3-5 years is a lot of time for a film
I don't care if you hate them, your skills are worthless and slim
I love Pixar, their employees, and their flicks
You insult them just to get your kicks
Last edited by IncredigirlVirginia on Sat May 01, 2010 10:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby JustSoWall-eCrazy » Sat May 01, 2010 8:04 pm

I love that poem! :D
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Sat May 01, 2010 9:11 pm

Aw, thanks, JustSoWall-eCrazy!!
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Postby IncredigirlVirginia » Thu Aug 12, 2010 12:08 am

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I have no shame.....yes, I drew this plague upon humanity.
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