Monster Mary (Boo at Fourteen)

I’ve been wanting to write this oneshot for a long time now, and finally have.

It’s about Boo’s (named Mary) life after the whole Monstropolis incident. Unfortunately, she is made fun ofand even tagged as crazy by her own family.

[url]http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5178922/1/Monster_Mary[/url]

What!!! I can’t believe no one’s replied to this!!! :angry: Seriously, you guys…!!!

I really, really enjoyed this, Rac_Rules… and honestly, it takes a lot in a story for me to actually like it or enjoy it. Especially in fanfiction, where things can tend to get really cliche or predictable. Yours wasn’t at all. :smiley:

I feel you really kept true to the fact that Mary continues to stay a child at heart and keeps those memories of Monstropolis - despite how hazy they may be to her - so close to her and cherishes them despite what everyone else thinks. Being rejected for simply believing something isn’t a good feeling, and I could really relate to Mary in a few ways; which made it more emotionally appealing. Your dialogue was easy to read and not flat out predictable like a lot of dialogue can be. There were probably one or two grammatical errors that I spotted, but I don’t want to be a grammar Nazi and point out every grammatical flaw of yours. We’re all human. :wink:

Overall, I think this short story should get a great deal more attention. However short it may be, it’s to-the-point and really brings a great range of feelings out of the reader. I forgot to mention that the conclusion was a satisfying end, and I really didn’t expect it to happen, for some reason. Excellent work on this, Rac_Rules, and keep up with your writing… you’ll improve with every short story you pen!!! :smiley:

little chef

Aw, thanks, little_chef_eva09, that made me feel really nice.

You’re welcome, you deserve it! :wink:

little chef

That was a really strongly sweet story, Rac_Rules! STILL wishes there was a happy-tears smiley

I love how you illustrated her perspective through your writing, how she felt like almost everyone was against her- it’s like I know exactly what she’s feeling. The story’s very well written, it got me feeling sorry for her, as angry and annoyed as her, as persevering-in-faith as her- I like how Mary’s not afraid to stand out, trying not to let everyone else get to her, rather than striving to change what she believes in to fit in (like Lilo from Lilo and Stitch). And how sometimes the only person she can trust is a little kid- I get that feeling sometimes, too, believe it or not, so I can really relate. Also how you wrote that her room was her favorite place in the world. I could actually feel her tears and relief through writing that. In addition to all that, I also like how she’s not ashamed of rather always being a child on the inside, which reminds me of Wendy’s character from Peter Pan. It’s both relatable for me and inspiring.

The story just came to life in my mind as I was reading it. It’s a beautiful, fantastic story about how through all the pain and misery of life, hope and faith can help one pull through and in time the pain and misery won’t matter in comparison. :smiley:

Yeah, I kinda went on and on there, didn’t I? I couldn’t help it…

Aw, BDD, I really liked that comment. It made me feel warm and fuzzy :slight_smile:

Thank you!

Aww, that was so sweet!

I was looking at the fanfiction index, and I came across this.

That was spectacular! Loved it -Omar