Space Chimps goes Spirted Away

Do you like my fanfic?

Here is my second fanfic here on Pixarplanet. I just hope I finish it! Tell me what you think.

Something is sneaking in the darkness.

A frog Man is coming into veiw.

Frog Man: Ah-ah! What the hell was that?!!

Okay, the story takes place in the bath house from Spirited Away. Anyways back to the story.

The something is still crawling around in the darkness.

It suddenly runs into Chihiro.

Chihiro: Ah, I wonder what that was! All I know is that you’re a little %$#4!

The something finally stops in an empty bathtub.

That something is a spaceship from Vanguard Animation Studios, that is on a special mission. The Space door opens. Out comes three Chimps that looked like they just got out from a black hole. “literally”

Ham: What should we name are kids?
Luna: Ham, please stop shouting out random perverted remarks. That’s how you ruined are first film.

Titan looks at Ham menacingly.
Ham: Okay.
Luna: Good, because we still have to steal the film rights to Sprited Away.

End of Chapter One.

In the future I’ll lengthen my chapters, I just wanted to introduce the story.

Interesting… I’m all for wacky mash-ups (since I’m a purveyor of one), and to take two films from opposite ends of the animation ‘awesomeness’ spectrum and combine them is pretty daring and inventive. I’ll have to see more before I can come up with an opinion and vote.
I don’t quite understand how a spaceship can fit into the bathtub (unless it’s miniature-sized). I haven’t watched Space Chimps, so I can’t comment on their personalities.
Try to flesh out the descriptions and improve on your writing presentation. Maybe you were going for a ‘narrator voiceover’ effect, but it’s jarring and pretty confusing at times.
Can’t wait for the second chapter! (Oh, and this should go into the Off-Topic Fanworks thread).

The Three Chimps all started walking out of the room with the bathtub. They knew that no one was there. The cheap animation fumes had rubbed off of there spaceship, cause-ing everyone to faint.

All of the chimps were unhappy that they belonged to such a poor animation studio.

Titan: Well that’s why we are here to steal the film rights to Spirited away. To make our studio a better place. And to shut down studio Ghibli. And… to make a thirty filmed series of Spirited Away all in theatres! Yeah.

Ham: Well how are we gonna do dat’ dork! heh. Hey Luna what should we name our kids.

Luna gives Ham a dirty look.

Luna: Ham. John Willams the founder of Vanguard gave us a detailed paper on how to steal the film rights.

Ham: what should we name our kids.

Just then Haku came by.

Haku: You shoudn’t be here right now! I will now cast a spell on you!

Luna and Titan ran out of the way.

Haku cast a spell on Ham. His mouth was a giant zipper.

Luna: Well that should work out.

Haku turned to cast a spell on Luna and Titan.

They both ran away, with Ham on their shoulders.

Titan: I think we lost him.

Luna: I hope so.

Haku: {Off Camera.} I’m coming to get you!

Luna and Titan kept running, until they ran into Yubaba’s door.

Luna: Here’s were the film rights are kept!

Luna and Titan with Ham still on their shoulders burst open Yubaba’s door.

End of Chapter Two

THis looks like a really fun story. I have enjoyed reading it so far.

I’ll move it to the Non-Pixar Fanworks section in the Members Inc section of the forums.

Thanks for the reweiws thedriveintheatre, and The Star Swordsman!

Chapter 3:

Meanwhile in the control room from Space Chimps…

John Williams: Are they close to getting the film rights?!?

Fat guy from Space Chimps: Oh yes they’re getting very close. So close I can almost taste it. {Gloomy Voice}

John Willams looks into a screen that shows the inside of the bathhouse. It shows a bunch of green heads bouncing around the three chimps. Yubaba apears to be missing.

John Willams: We need to get those film rights!

John Willams looks over to a giant portal in which the chimps went in to steal the film rights.

John Willams: And were almost running out of time.

Back to the bath house…

The three green heads are bouncing around Ham, Luna, and Titan.

Luna: What do we do?!!

Titan looks around.

Titan: Maybe we can rub off some more cheap animation fumes!

Titan and Luna start dusting off themselves. The three green heads fall down passed out on the floor. The cheap animation fumes make the giant baby in the back start crying.

Yubaba comes running into the door.

Yubaba: WHAT HAVE YOU DON’T TO MY BABY!!!

The baby continues to crie.

Yubaba: I REPEAT, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY BABY!!!

Titan: {scream} I WILL NOT ANSWEAR ANY OF THOSE QUESTIONS UNTIL YOU TELL ME WERE THE FILM RIGHTS ARE!!!

Yubaba casts a spell on the room. The baby stops crying.

Yubaba: Okay next time don’t be so loud you can just talk like everyone else. Secondly, if you want to see the film rights, then I’ll show you the film rights…

End of Chapter 3

{Mods, please do not edit for shouting. }

This is really weird.

Yet strangely hilarious.