Dude, I have so many! In fact I have one in my sig right now! Although I’m not sure how many of them i can get away with quoting here, if you know what I mean Here’s one:
Stewie (talking to Brian): Let’s see, something good, something good. You look like Snoopy and it makes me smile. Where you need improvement: You have smelly dog farts…
Lawyer: “so what are your demands?”
Head of the Maids Union: “We need more lemon Pledge”
lawyer: “You need more lemon Pledge?”
Head of the Maids Union: “yes”
lawyer: “We’re not responsible for that, you should just bring it yourself”
Head of the Maids Union: “nnnnoooooo”
Black Knight: “You see kids, your father is nothing but a fizzle!” Peter: “Nobody calls me a fizzle and gets away with it! Except for that one guy who called me a fizzle and then ran away, he got away with it. But most of the people who call me a fizzle don’t get away with it! Actually he was the only guy to ever call me a fizzle, but after today only half the people who have ever called me a fizzle will have gotten away with it!”
I love that fizzle line! Imagine calling someone a fizzle and seeing what reaction they would have…
Here’s a good one:
Brian: You’re asking if they ever did a Sesame Street where the Count kills somebody and sucks out their blood for sustenance.
Peter: Yeah
Brian: No, they’ve never done that.
lennonluvr9 - I have taken on your challenge of calling someone a fizzle. And that Count line is the funniest. I also like this similar quote of Brian’s when they visit Brown University:
Chris: “Ha-ha-ha! Brown is the color of poo.”
Brian: “Yes. Yes it is.”
Haha! Awesome! I might just call someone a fizzle too just as an experiment!
Peter: We do not want to tell Cleveland. That’s the last thing in the world we want to do…(sometime later) Well, that’s it. We’ve done everything in the world there is to do.
Oh yeah! I loved that! That was actually a perfect spoof of the 1970s version of Match Game, which I sometimes catch on Game Show Network. That actually makes me think of a Price is Right one, but I cant repeat it here
Peter: What’s heaven like?
Nate Griffin: It’s fine. There’s a shortage of chairs
Peter: oh.
Nate: yeah…
Lois: Peter, if you shock me, I swear to God, I’m gonna leave you.
Brian: “Now insert Rod Support A into Slot B”. And if you say ‘that’s what she said’ one more time, I’m gonna pop you.
Dr. Hartman: Hmm, 29 lbs; that’s big for your age.
Stewie: Well, forgive me for not being one of those anorexic babies from the diaper commercials.
Lois: I am very upset with you right now.
Peter: Okay, so I tried on your bra. The fellas were putting on a show. I didn’t think I’d make a good Gigi either, but God help me, I was flattered.
Peter: I don’t know where he went. I just asked him to buy me some peanuts and cracker jacks.
Brian: I don’t care if he ever gets back. (beat) I wasn’t being cute; I really hope he’s dead.
Lois: Peter you are so immature! Sometimes it feels like i’ve married a child!
Peter: Oh yeah Lois? If Im a child you know what that makes you? a pedophile!