“Let’s play some dog songs!”
From some old musician guy whose concert I went to. 
The funniest one I have ever heard.
“Remember, Urinate begings with U. You do it, we go inside.”
My brother was taking my puppy to use the bathroom. And it usually takes a while before my puppy goes. But as soon as he said that, he went!
On an audio commentary for The Simpsons.
Mike Reiss - " My voice is a little shot today, but I had to come in for the free lunch."
I’m guessing somebody said this in the beginning but …
" I like eggs ! "
“She wears glasses and she still can’t read and write!”
A class mate about our history teacher who has a really bad writing.
“Mom, there is a robot on the phone.”
Someone random called my house (he got the wrong number). It was a little 7 year old kid. I don’t sound like a robot do I? 
My sister on Halloween: “We should dress as candy and they give us costumes.”
-sheila
Ha ha ha, that is just so funny!
Not the last time I heard your voice.
rachel: No one here has, but I think I scared the kid. I was kinda talking dark and monotonic.
What about on the PP podcast? Yeah, that would be scary.
Oh yeah, I remember. I guess I was just in a great mood at that time.