No, I know. That’s the real problem. I know this is a totally unfounded fear, and I do fine talking with girls I know, but for some reason I can’t get past the stupid mental block I’ve built up. Probably won’t get over it til I just bite the bullet and do it.
aerostarmonk: Not sure why you hate yourself, even though I don’t know you well, you seem like a pretty cool dude to me. I’ve learned that people’s perceptions of us are almost never as bad as we think they are. I know it’s hard, but having confidence in yourself and just talking to people can make a huge difference, you’ve be surprised how people respond to it. I know it doesn’t mean much coming from me since I have my own issues with talking to people, but I really do know this is the case, I just can’t seem to get myself to do it.
“They’re actually better” doesn’t do much to ease my intimidation. In fact if anything that statement actually ratchets up the anxiety, feelings of inferiority and inadequacy.
It doesn’t matter if I’m writing on the Internet or talking to people in real life, every time I talk it never comes out as well as it sounded in my head. It’s all this sloppy presentation and jumbled speech and tortured language.
Not to say that I don’t have days when I overcome my flaws. They’re just few and far between.
Aero: I feel ya. I have the hardest time talking to guys of any age. I don’t really know what it is, but whenever I go to say something, it comes out sounding really dumb and it doesn’t even make sense. The worst part is - whenever I do that, they start laughing at me. It makes me feel even more like a jerk.
I guess I have just never been around guys who actually want to make a conversation as comfortable as possible for me. And you all wonder why I have never had a boyfriend…?
Not like I care or anything, it’s just… nice for a girl to get a compliment from a guy once in a while, and I haven’t had a compliment from a guy since, well, ever. I’m really good at being invisible, I guess.
One thing I do love about myself: I’m incredibly lame. And no not in an ironic context. A lot of the things I love are incredibly lame. I know they are lame and I’m happy that they are lame. Not because it’s a rejection of the mainstream or majority way of thought, but simply because they appeal to me
Like I love the film adaptations of Wild Wild West and Mystery Men. I love a little known flick written by Lucas called Radioland Murders. I love that really awkward sci-fi show Sliders. I still enjoy watching educational kids show in an unironic fashion, even one about a dog who learns to talk after eating alphabet soup.
Proud to be a lame-o!
However pride in lameness doesn’t buy you any respect with anyone. It’s a double-edged sword.
I often wish I could be seen as attractive in any way, shape or form, instead of just being seen of always being seen as nothing more than a friend/acquaintance by anyone really.
You’d be surprised what people really think about you. I always thought I was ugly, but I recently found out I am considered “kinda cute”. Things are never as bad as they seem.
I own several dozen dresses and skirts. The total number is most likely around 70. My dress collection at the beginning of 2010 was… wait for it… less than 5. Can you guess where a good chunk of my paycheck went?
Next summer, I’m going to spend my earnings on travel (Japan!), kitchen items, and animation books (I’d like to own all of the “Art of” books for Disney, Pixar, and Studio Ghibli). I think there’s something wrong with my priorities…
Most of them are vintage, so they weren’t $50 or anything like that (though some were). I think my cheapest purchase was a skirt for ten cents. Man did that make a dent in my wallet. /sarcasm It’s pretty nice because I don’t have to wear an outfit more than once per warm season–and I don’t have to wear jeans and t-shirts! I used to wear those 99.9% of the time but I think my personality is more suited for dresses and cutesy stuff like that.
Keep trying! It’s a beautiful song. If I learned to play it (with whatever instrument) I would probably be blubbering like an idiot nonstop.
Welcome to the club! Really the biggest appeal of owning one is watching the Pixar movies (every single one–all the way back to 1995) in gorgeous picture quality. I haven’t seen any traditionally animated movies yet besides some clips from The Princess and the Frog special features. I’d like to see what the older, pre-CAPS films look like so I can decide whether or not they’re worth the extra money on Blu-Ray.
Um… I capitalize all of my Ns when I write by hand.
Sorry, mate. I didn’t think about that effect. It’s just that I’m so smitten of girls… They’re great.
It makes me feel even more like a jerk. 
And you all wonder why I have never had a boyfriend…?
I’m really good at being invisible, I guess. 
