Mom: Someone needs to wash my car.
Me: Why not get a car-wash?
Mom: Don’t get smart with me.
(mom leaves)
ME: Good morning to you too mom.
Rita Skeeter: Congratulations, Harry! I wonder if you could give me a quick word? How you felt facing that dragon? How you feel now, about the fairness of the scoring?
Harry Potter: Yeah, you can have a word. Good-bye.
The First Task
“If it took more than one shot, You Weren’t using a Jakobs!”
- Marcus Kincaid, Borderlands.
“Percy wouldn’t recognize a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing Dobby’s tea-cosy.”
Ron Weasley, The House-Elf Liberation Front
“I love you, but not like you’d love a cat, because that would just be weird.”
My friend Josh
“Go ahead, make my day”
Harry Callahan, Sudden Impact
“Half the kids in the class didn’t vote for your nephew. What about them? You don’t give a crp about them because they aren’t on your side. People like you preach tolerance and openmindedness all the time but when it comes to middle America you think we’re all evil and stupid country yokels who need your political alignment. Just because you’re on TV doesn’t mean you know crp about the government.”
– Mr. Garrison yelling at Rosie O’Donnell, South Park
“Don’t Look into the Light!”
- Emile, Equipped with the Spartan Laser in Firefight matchmaking with IWHBYD on.
“A week ago, Harry would have said finding a partner for a dance would be a cinch compared to taking on a Hungarian Horntail. But now that he had done the latter, and was facing the prospect of asking a girl to the ball, he thought he’d rather have another round with the Horntail.”
The Unexpected Task
Captain America (asking about the shield to peggy): “So, how do you think about it?”
(Peggy shoots at him, the shield deflects it) Peggy: “I think it works.”
Harry Potter: Why do they have to move in packs? How’re you supposed to get one on their own to ask them?
Ron Weasley: Lasso one?
Potter and Weasley trying to ask a girl for a date, The Unexpected Task
“Carmelo is cheese!”
Myself, playing video games.
“Harry tried not to watch Cho and Cedric too much; it gave him a strong desire to kick something”
The Yule Ball
Now that we’ve got great hair, we can meet girls.
Fairly Odd Parents.
Harry Potter: Hagrid, look what I’ve got for relatives! Look at the Dursleys!
Albus Dumbledore: An excellent point. My own brother, Aberforth, was prosecuted for practicing inappropriate charms on a goat. It was all over the papers, but did Aberforth hide? No, he did not! He held his head high and went about his business as usual! Of course, I’m not entirely sure he can read, so that may not have been bravery…
Rita Skeeter’s Scoop
A couch potato with a sooped up remote… I’m petrified.
Raven, Teen Titans.
“Come seek us where our voices sound,
We cannot sing above the ground,
And while you’re searching, ponder this:
We’ve taken what you’ll sorely miss,
An hour long you’ll have to look,
And to recover what we took,
But past an hour - the prospect’s black
Too late, it’s gone, it won’t come back.”
The Egg and the Eye
I remember that show!
“Africa is NOTHING like The Lion King. I think that movie took a lot of artistic license”
-Elder Price, The Book of Mormon: The Musical
It is all over!
Mike Goldberg, UFC.
Carl Fredricksen: Hey, let’s play a game. It’s called “see who can be quiet the longest.”
Russell: Cool! My mom loves that game!
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